The Kidlit Interview Series
In The Only Thing Worse Than Witches, eleven-year-old Rupert cannot resist applying to an advertisement to be a witch's apprentice, but quickly finds himself over his head with the young witch-in-training who desperately needs his help. Roald Dahl meets Eva Ibbotson in this hilarious debut that's perfect for reading aloud!
JK ROWLING. JK ROWLING. 1000 TIMES JK ROWLING.
Why? She would have awesome stories, owns all the Hallows (most important in this case, the invisibility cloak), and we can just shout EXPECTO PATRONUM to protect ourselves from zombies.
2. Look, I got a time machine on eBay! Where do you want to go? (Said time machine may possibly malfunction and leave you there. Possibly. It was *very* cheap.)
Um... is it weird that my first instinct is to go to 399 B.C. to see the trial of Socrates firsthand? I'd probably attempt to stop his execution while I was there, but things always go awry when you try to tamper with time!
Or I'd try to hang out with my grandparents or parents when they were kids. Or maybe I'd go back in time to hang out with my 4th grade self! (I'd have to be very careful not to create a paradox here, though. Murky waters.)
Or I'd go BACK TO THE FUTURE! Like thousands of years into the future! None of this 2100 stuff. Year 500,000 or BUST!
Too many possibilities. I'd probably be paralyzed by the decision--and just stare at the shiny buttons before quietly climbing out.
3. What’s your favourite thing about writing for kids?
4. A witch has cast a spell on you (sorry about that) and you’ve woken up as a character in a children’s book – what’s your special talent or power?
I would love the power to morph my appearance at will. That way I could fool other characters into telling me information they would only have told a character who wasn't me. (This power would be especially useful in mysteries. But, I guess that means it would also make me the prime suspect... Hmm.... maybe I should rethink this.)
5. What’s the scariest or strangest thing you’ve ever done?
The scariest thing I've ever done: At summer camp, I crashed a sailboat into another boat and caused them both to sink. Moral of the story: never let me drive the sailboat.
The strangest thing I've ever done: In Scotland, I stuck my face in an ice-cold river for seven seconds because it was fabled to be a fairy river of eternal youth.
6. What’s something you wish you’d known about writing when you started out?
I wish I'd known how to revise. For years, growing up, I thought revising meant line editing. ("Hahahahaha," older Lauren laughs at her younger self.) Who knew that one day, I'd end up cutting full sections of books? Move the end to the beginning, the beginning to the end, and mash it all around! Learning how to revise was a pivotal moment for me--and is actually my favorite part of the process now.
What’s something you wish you’d known about publishing?
I wish I'd known how many years it would take. (11 years, from the time I seriously picked up the pen until publication.) Actually, scratch that. I guess it was better that I didn't know.
7. What would your daemon be?
A one-eyed one-horned flying purple people eater. Clearly.
8. My book doesn’t have dragons, but it does have... BUNNIES. Which are more ferocious than dragons. Also it has witches, which are more cackle-y than dragons, and toecorn (chewy, meaty popcorn made from toes), which is a lot tastier than dragons (arguably).